THE UGLY WIFE OF DR. PRINCE

Hey Friends and Family
My short story is out on Okada Books. Go grab a Copy.

Download Link: THE UGLY WIFE OF DR. PRINCE

DON'T BLAME IT ON LOVE

Have you ever had your heart dashed against a rock, broken, like glass, into a thousand pieces? These experiences are becoming a lot more frequent in our modern day as the value placed on morality as fallen from the costly price of diamond to crawl like the price of common salt.
There are more people who want to use you or abuse you more than there are who want to build you and be with you. Although more promises are made, more hearts are broken and the hairs of promise are so unkempt like a mad man's.

These turn of events have forced more people to become lovers of themselves, hoping that by so doing, they'll have no reason to trust anyone other than themselves, in order just to avoid the often traumatic experience that has forced a number of people into committing suicide, indulging in masturbation, un-affectionate relationships (friends with benefits), homosexuality and or lesbianism. Unfortunately even the rise in Feminism is from a forced angle of disappointments by men among women - either as victims of rape or marital abuse.

Who then is to blame?
While the argument persists (to eternity) as to who's to blame between men and women, it is good to note that a lot more people have actually given up on the person and or idea of Love.
Nowadays we hear folks say, 'I don't believe in Love', 'Love doesn't exist!' and so on and so on. But majority of those who say so still bare a grudge or carry a weight of unforgiveness for someone they loved (still love) but show hatred towards for breaking their hearts.

When I began to reflect on this after a series of back-to-back hearts breaks, and then I realised that we may blame Love or refuse to believe in Love when those we love disappoint us, but it's not Love that is the problem, it's the people we fall in Love with. You see, Love is: real, pure, true, faithful, patient, humble, sincere and understanding. John, in one of his books in the Bible describe Love in the simplest, yet powerful way, he says 'God is Love.' Wow! I actually didn't understand this until my spirit was opened up to the understanding of that line of words. Have you tried to imagine the hardest criminal, prostitute, liar, killer...? Irrespective of what they've done, God ultimately forgives them once they repent. Imagine walking through the streets of gold in heaven, and seeing someone who murdered a family you knew, or wrecked your life? Won't it be annoyingly incredible! You see, that's how loving God is. He is so generous in Loving that He is called Love. So Loving that He gave His Only Son, Jesus to die for the sins of all men, that they may be saved.

To whatever extent we have been badly hurt, and how angry, disappointed or suicidal we feel, that is the same capacity we have to be loving, forgiving and accommodating again. Of cos, this doesn't mean we should foolishly run back into the arms of those who have used and abused us, but we must be willing to let go, and let our hearts be open (by wisdom) to new people who are willing to walk the mile with us and who are ultimately worth the while.

Here's my testimony and confession many years back, 'Since I fell in Love, I never stood up; That's what real men and women do!
I'm Real, what about You?

- Melchizedek, son of Michael (Photo Credit: Google)

[Do you have a challenging love situation you need to talk to someone about? Are you feeling broken, rejected and unwilling to open up again, forgive or move on? Inbox me or drop a comment below for everyone to share their views.]

Get Your Valentine Texts and Poems

Imagine if you sent your Val a 'copy and paste' text message that seven other guys/ladies sent to him/her? You are ten times likely to lose him/her to someone who got a customized text/poem from me.

LABOUR

There is something staggering about women that won’t cease to amaze me, the United Nations argues that about 830 women die daily (globally) from pregnancy or childbirth related causes. This is said to be equivalent to about one woman every two minutes. Although the rise in modern medicine and advancements in science has reduced maternal death rate, women still have complications. The joy and stunner of the whole statistic is that; 

WOMEN WONT STOP GETTING PREGNANT! 

Wow! There have been rumors of women screaming during labour, cursing their husbands and saying they’ll never do it again, but almost a year down the line, they are back with their backs in the theater beds pushing out the baby (ies). The truth is, regardless of the pains, risks and complications associated with pregnancy and childbirth, our women are more than willing to go to labour. Why? Because when they are going through the thrusts of sex, they ultimately do their best to look beyond the labour, they tune their ears, not to their cry but the cry of their baby, not to their pains but the joy of having a child they can call their own. There is a lesson in this.  

As the global treads of hunger and poverty, collapse of currencies, inadequacies of government, increase in corruption, intolerances of people and citizens continue, our attentions are quickly drawn to the increasing need to labour all the more. As a child I bought a bottle of coke for #2, then #5, but that same bottle of coke costs about #70 now. Sweets that used to be sold in kobos now costs about five strained pieces for #20. What #100 could afford about a year ago, it can no longer boast of.

My late father once told me not to expect anything in form of a will from him, he said, ‘my father was a farmer and didn’t own a bicycle, if I trusted in his inheritance, all I’ll have are cutlasses, hoes and a farm.’ That said, it becomes striking in our age that increasingly, young men and women are becoming lazier, they want the rollercoaster kind of life, they want cheap and free things; pizzas and salads, trips to Dubai, shopping in the US, riding a 2015 model car and more. That’s why you hear very silly statements like ‘If someone can just dash me a million dollars.’ uttered with such seriousness. We all want to be made without going through the process of making.

In the Book of Lamentations Chapter 3 verse 27, New King James Version (NKJV), the writer says:  

“It is good for a man to bear the yoke in his youth.”

While many young men and women are refusing to labour in the days of their youth, they ultimately cannot see ahead to the labour, yoke they are automatically endangering their old age to. Another passage of the Holy Bible says in Proverbs, ‘The glory of young men is their strength.’ Strength as we know is for work, and work equals force times distance (that’s labour.)

If we are to attain a great future, to realize our dreams and be able to afford all that we desire on earth, it is imperative that we learn from the women to labour now for the joy of what we desire to birth in our lives.

-          Melchizedek, son of Michael   

Photo Credit: Google Search

LOSING STEAM [EPISODE I]

In barely four days, January 2017 will be added to the pages of history books, merely to be recounted but never to be revisited.

Lately, I began to realise how unconsciously I had begun to lose steam, the vigour with which I started the year, my plans, my focus, my drive… there were nights I felt drained out, confused about the possibilities of the future I had scribbled down for the year. So I decided to take a break and re-examine why I was losing steam, why I have failed to hit my personal goals for this month, why I should not give up but press on to the mark set before me. I know many are wearing my type of shoes, losing steam just a few steps away from the starting line.

So, I began to meditate on how to catch the needed fire, get the needed adrenaline to run through this year with head held high.

The vital question arises ‘Why do we lose steam?’

The first reason why many of us lose steam is because we did not set out with goals in the first place.

 If you are familiar with the game of football, imagine a major match, let’s say between Barcelona Vs Real Madrid, with thousands of fans in the stands, millions sitting on the edge of their sits, grinding their teeth and staring into their TV sets, people betting on and off line with so much money at stake, coaches, journalists and players all on pitch, and just when the referees show up and the whistle is blown, the cameras turn to both ends of the pitch and we see there are no goal posts! What an insane situation that would be, it could be termed the greatest pitch disaster in football history. But do you know that’s how many of us start our year or approach our dreams in life? We are all excited about our dreams; who and what we want, where we hope to be, but we so often fail to set out goals to achieve them. It can be tiring, were the match to start in the given scenario, the players would run, dribble and play, the crowd will cheer but it would end with blistered bleeding feet, exhaustion mixed with frustration and absolutely no result. It’s like running a race without a finish line. It’s also similar to starting a car without defining where you’re heading; you’ll end up by a roadside with either a flat tire or an empty tank. Setting out with goals has the propelling and compelling power to drive us to accomplishment. Goals are like a target at a distance, they form the aim and the path through which our bullets travel. They are like a vision afar that the heart always needs to beat after.

Another reason why people lose steam is discouragement.

Maybe you began the year on a positive note and somewhere along the line, you encounter some unexpected challenges, or people told you your dreams are not worth it and won’t fly, maybe it’s even lack of support from your loved ones, friends and or family, or you didn’t get that much-needed fund to fly that project or idea. However true the situations may be, you have to realize that no one (realistically) actually wakes up expecting to be involved in an auto crash, have his or her legs amputated and walk on wheels the rest of their lives, but terrible things do happen out of the blue, we can get caught up in unforeseen events, the sun can go down and the lights can go off, but until we look carefully to find the COURAGE in our dis-COURAGE-ment, we may never find the need to forge ahead. It’s high time we begin to readjust our mindset and accept that failures, discouragement, hardship and disappointments are an integral part of life, while they shouldn’t be our approach to everyday life, they, however, happen to every known man on the face of the earth. The bigger picture, however, is not the circumstances we face but how we face them; it’s not about the war we face but the warrior within us. I can’t remember where I read or heard this, ‘you can break my body but you can’t kill my spirit.’ We must learn to thrive and survive, whatever may come our way. Stop asking ‘why me?’ should it then be your neighbour, brother, mother or friend? Would that be good enough for you? The greater advantage of problems to those it comes to is an underlying ability to overcome them and a strong mind to dismantle them.

Read below, a true life, inspiring story of an athlete which I adapted from http://brainprick.com/john-stephen-akhwari-the-greatest-last-place-finish-in-olympic-history/ to drive home some points:

It was on a hot Sunday afternoon, October 1968 Olympic Games; 3:00 pm local time in Mexico City the men’s marathon started with 74 participants but 17 of them could not finish the 26 mile race. At 7pm, it was almost an hour since all marathon runners had crossed the finishing line when suddenly; a lone runner wearing the colours of Tanzania emerged through the stadium gate literally hobbling. The event left the last few thousand audiences amazed with what they experienced next – the man who emerged was John Stephen Akhwari, who while running, had fallen down and had badly hurt himself. He was bleeding and his knee had got dislocated from the joint.

Considering the severity of his injuries, Akhwari was repeatedly asked to quit the race but he denied. He fell, dragged himself, ran in between but finished the marathon limping over the line. On the finishing line, he received a huge applause and almighty cheers from the little crowd. His body was exhausted but not his spirit; his competitors crossed him one by one but his determination rewarded him in tremendous pain. Akhwari never won any Olympic gold medal but he became the greatest example of never-give-up spirit, and a tale of courage.

When he was asked the reason of doing such kind of crazy act, he replied,

“My country did not send me 10,000 miles just to start the race; they sent me to finish the race.”

Ever since, John Stephen Akhwari has been honoured and symbolised as the living example of courage and determination. In 1983, he was awarded a National Hero Medal of Honor. In 2000, he was invited to the Olympics in Sydney, Australia and 2008 he was invited in Beijing as a goodwill ambassador to inspire the Olympic athletes for the 2008 Games.

To be continued…

-          Melchizedek, son of Michael

Sit On Your Egg

I just left a senior colleague's table at the office but my heart is still sitting and my ears are wide open to all he had to say about me, about him, about the future. I feel inspired to write this to encourage someone out there.

There is a mystery that surrounds the egg. This mysterious mystery is not so much a misery, it's simply this: you can't tell what an egg would hatch.

Growing up, my father (Late Pa Micheal Ekundayo) though highly educated, a graduate of the prestigious OAU was fond of farming. We (his children) hated farming; walking down the narrow bush paths in the early morning with the irritating feeling of dew on grass blades scratching at our legs, accompanied by the buzz and comfort of early morning flies - we felt like ripe rotten mangoes. We would sometimes cry and slap at ourselves from the bite of sand flies late into the evenings when we plucked beans with bent backs. There was the melon (Egusi), rotten and smelling in greenish-brown decaying pods which we had to scoop out with our hands - sometimes we wore nylon made hand gloves but I'm yet to know a perfume so strong as the smell that came with it. No matter how much you scrub and bath and spray and breath, you'll still smell of it for a minimum of two to three days. But father didn't care what we thought or how we felt, he would tell us that was what his father brought him up with. He would make us understand that if he looked to inherit anything from his father, it would only be a farm (his father had no bicycle.) He would tell us we shouldn't look forward to inheriting anything from him other than what we earned for ourselves under him.

I grew up with these values and it shaped my thoughts of being a man; i found (and still find it) hard to give my clothes out for washing, to leave dishes unwashed, to be lazy, idle, dirty, untidy or totally dependent on people for my entire well-being. My father was also given to rearing animals, so we went from tying goats in raining seasons, to feeding chickens in all seasons.

So I've been thinking and reconciling facts about the eggs and the hen. I've since observed the hen;

- Back then, some of our hens were so devoted to their eggs that for 21 whole days, you wouldn't see them leave the eggs, they would sit diligently. I recall some nights when we had to get out of bed to watch a fight between some of our hens and snakes. They were usually fierce fights that ended with the snakes escaping but left the brave chicken with a bite and death on or before morning. They were so willing to fight and die for their eggs.

- There are certain times (particularly during the peak of the Babangida era and Abacha) that we largely ate eggs from our hen, as meat was costly. At that time, we removed the eggs some of our hens laid and made a meal of it. However the situation, I noticed some of these hens would passionately sit on the spot where these eggs were laid, until we drove them away repeatedly. They didn't care if we ate their eggs, they were willing to mate and lay again. They were 'dogs' - so dogged.

- There were countless times we had to throw rotten eggs away - eggs that didn't hatch after the incubation period - they smell the worse.There is no guarantee that every egg would hatch, yet the hen is willing to sit on it. This uncertainty didn't stop the hen, it was always determined that even if it would hatch a chick out of ten eggs, it was worth the wait and the raise.

Enough said of the many animal lessons. Now to you and to me, how willing are you and I to sit on our dreams. How dogged are we to fight and if necessary 'die' for them. Every dream, like the egg, comes with a lot of uncertainty, we can't if they would hatch, if the chicks would grow into chickens or die as chicks, we can't tell if they would be hens or cocks... but are we willing like the hen to incubate, hatch and raise our eggs? One key note is this - whatever comes out of an egg, no matter how small, no matter how fragile... is always bigger and better than the egg, even if it fails or get carried away by the hawk, it was always worth the wait and the try.

I'm urging you today, Sit on your Egg, incubate that Egg, Hatch that Chick and Raise that Chicken. The world is waiting but it's all under your choice to brood or live and walk the earth as a god who died a mortal.

Melchizedek, son of Michael. [2/9/2016] photo credit: wisegeek dot org

The Dangers of Falling in Love (Part 2)

Anchor:

Songs of Solomon 8:6: “Set me as a seal upon your heart, As a seal upon your arm; For love is as strong as death… Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame..” (NKJV)

In Part 1 of our discussion, we were able to point out some key factors about falling in love and the state of the heart; we were able to note that;

•      Contrary to common opinion, love is not blind and we don’t actually ‘fall’ in love, we walk into it, it’s a decision we actually make either consciously or unconsciously.
•      We also made it clear that the heart is the center of our being and whomever we let into it, we automatically grant that person a right over our spirit, soul and body.
•           And we concluded that irrespective of whoever we have let into our hearts, which made a mess of things, we can still find hope and renewing in Christ Jesus.

On this note, we forge ahead to conclude this admonition.

"Love is a force; it is actually the greatest force in the whole universe. Like a mighty rushing wind or a raging flood, it is capable of throwing a full grown man off his feet. It’s so strong that God in His Almightiness gave His Only Begotten Son (Jesus) for You and I."

From our Anchor scripture, we read the concluding part ‘…for love is as strong as death… its flames are flames of fire, a most vehement flame.’ These short but strong lines are the very key indicators that spark when the dangers of falling in love are highlighted. As I meditate on this verse, I imagine love as a mighty water that usually stands at the door of our heart, we can’t be too sure about controlling it, we can’t be too sure how much measure of it would rush in when we open up the doors of our heart just a little. Love is a force; it is actually the greatest force in the whole universe. Like a mighty rushing wind or a raging flood, it is capable of throwing a full grown man off his feet. It’s so strong that God in His Almightiness gave His Only Begotten Son (Jesus) for You and I. There is a major mistake we make, time and again, we often think we can control love but that’s not true. We can, and should control our emotions which are the locks on the door of our heart but we must know that love, like its sisters (joy, peace…) cannot be measured, they have a way of taking us by surprise. If we can however put our emotions under control, we would have been able to ‘control’ the measure of love and to whom we give it to in our lives.

"There is a major mistake we make, time and again, we often think we can control love but that’s not true. We can, and should control our emotions which are the locks on the door of our heart but we must know that love, like its sisters (joy, peace…) cannot be measured, they have a way of taking us by surprise."

I have seen relationships where the lady (quite often the case but not necessarily) was constantly being abused by this man she loved. Although she had to put up with his drinking and smoking and beating her up, cheating on her, accusing her and even demanding money from her, she just couldn’t stop loving him. We may sit back and call her stupid and even make claims that you and I are not that dump, but the truth is we are merely underestimating the power and the force of love and do not grasp its superiority over the potent power of death. I once was in a relationship with a lady who cheated on me on several occasions, given the gift of visions and dreams, I would have a dream of her stabbing me in the back, hugging different men and all that. I would wake up with the interpretations of these dreams, call her and ask her if she was cheating on me, she would deny it, cry and claim that I didn’t trust her. I would beg her and butcher myself for ‘accusing’ her but every time she cheated on me, I would somehow catch her red-handed. I was so fortunate that some of her secret lovers became my friends by chance and disclosed how they had dated her behind my back. But in ALL these, I would forgive her, beg her and believe that she would somehow change and be faithful. I tried to do everything I could, broke my promises and principles and bank accounts and all for her but she didn’t change and she cheated and broke up with me but I couldn’t stop loving her – such is the power of love, stronger than death. It’s like a vehement fire; it consumes the entirety of our being.

Like water, fire is one of the elements that can barely be controlled: on a candle stick, on a burning stove, in a furnace, it looks under control, friendly and working for our good but it is naturally restless and always looking for avenues to express itself; it has no friends, it has no foes. Such is Love. Such is the danger of falling in love. 

"Like water, fire is one of the elements that can barely be controlled: on a candle stick, on a burning stove, in a furnace, it looks under control, friendly and working for our good but it is naturally restless and always looking for avenues to express itself; it has no friends, it has no foes. Such is Love. Such is the danger of falling in love."

Then comes the question, ‘Are you saying we should not fall in love?’ No! The argument is this, in realizing that Love is stronger than death, that it is a force, a fire that we can’t truly control, it becomes our ultimate responsibilities to ensure that we fall in love with the right persons. If we fall in love with the right person, we are like candles ignited by the fires of love, gently melting away but emanating the beauty of light; neither the thread or the wax feels threatened by the fire, they both begin and die together. But to fall in love with the wrong person is like wool before fire, a burning house; there is no beauty, just chaos, confusion and casualties. We get burnt, and if the fire is not put out immediately, we burn out, and could ultimately lose our lives.  

"If we fall in love with the right person, we are like candles ignited by the fires of love, gently melting away but emanating the beauty of light; neither the thread or the wax feels threatened by the fire, they both begin and die together. But to fall in love with the wrong person is like wool before fire, a burning house; there is no beauty, just chaos, confusion and casualties. We get burnt, and if the fire is not put out immediately, we burn out, and could ultimately lose our lives." 

Are you currently in an abusive relationship or in love with someone who doesn’t love you in return? Perhaps you are feeling helpless and restless, maybe defending him or her and pretending that all is going well and hoping that this habit, abuse… would change by magi, my dear, the truth is you are in love and you may be totally wrong. You need help, you can still call your emotions to order and quench this strange fire before you are completely burnt out. The aim of love is to love till death do us part but it has to be with the right person, someone who is equally ready to give their all for you as you would for them. Someone you can be happy with all the days of your live, someone you would wish to marry again if there was ever an opportunity to return to the world again and re-begin life. You may not need to, You MUST have to talk to your parents, a counselor, your pastor and elder or someone responsible and trustworthy about your current predicament. Believe you me, that lady or gentleman is not the best of the rest in the world, you can truly find another man or woman who brings joy and satisfaction to your life today. However, you need to talk to God about it, to invite Jesus into your heart, to restore order and love and say ‘peace be still’ to every flood of love that has ravaged, blinded and devastated your being because of the wrong persons.

Kindly say this prayer with me, 

‘Lord Jesus, I call upon you to help me, to restore peace and sanity to my heart and place your seal by your Holy spirit upon my heart. Deliver me from every bondage of love to the wrong persons, open my eyes and my mind of understanding, help me find my way and the one who truly loves me according to your will for me, so that I may live my life without bitterness and hatred and anger in Jesus name. Amen.'

Have you said this prayer, have you been touched or encouraged but still need to talk to someone today? You can reach us at: kayodeakomolafe@gmail.com, whatsapp: +2348065269630 or bbm: 2BBFF6CB.

Remain Blessed.

Melchizedek, son of Michael